Laura T. Meade - Me and My Dolls 1898

CHAPTER I


MYSELF; ALSO PEEP-BO
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I DON’T think I am at all young: I am five.

Johnny is only two, and the baby — of course she is just a tiny thing; but I am big and rather old. I can run fast, and jump, and go round and round without being at all giddy. Nursie said once that Miss Bo-Peep must have a very strong head. I don’t know quite what she meant, for I had not knocked it against anything. I was just flying round and round the nursery, and Johnny was screaming and trying to follow me, and Frank was lashing his whip, because he was pretending that I was a pony, and that he was my master.

Frank is seven; he is very tall, and very strong. He is nearly grown up, and he can read and write.

I know my A B C as far as K, and I can do "A was an apple pie," and a bit of "The House that Jack built," but I cannot read and I cannot write, though I try very hard, and I do want to write so badly.

I want to write about my dolls. One of my dolls is lost, — I will tell you about her by and by. Then I have a doll called Molly, — she has only one arm, — and Peep-Bo, who has a funny head. Peep-Bo was called after me, ‘cause I am BoPeep, though my real, real own name is Maggie.

You see, people, that I have lots and lots to tell; and last night, when I was woke by baby crying because he is cutting his eye-tooth, I thought of my Lullaby, my doll that was lost in the snow.

I said, very soft, because I didn’t want to wake anybody, "Nursie !"

Nursie said, "Do not make a noise, Bo-Peep !"

I wasn’t making a noise. I was only saying "Nursie." I began to cry, and at last I roared, and Nursie jumped out of bed and said, "What’s the matter, Pet ?"

I knew Nursie was not angry when she said "Pet," and I said, with my cheek up against Nursie’s ear, "Nursie, I’m thinking of Lullaby, that was lost in the snow."

"Oh ! that doll !" Nursie said. "It is months and months ago since she was lost. Go to sleep, Miss Bo-Peep, and do not be silly."

Then I knew Nursie had almost forgotten my dolly; and, of course, if Nursie would forget, so would Frank, and perhaps soon there would be no people that would remember her. I knew then that it must be written down.

Ellen is now writing it down.

Ellen is the under-nurse, and she helps Nursie to take care of me and Frank and Johnny and Baby.

I love Ellen, she has such a softy face, and I like her eyes because they are big and stick out. I like eyes that stick out, because my dolly’s did.

Now I will begin about my dolls.

I will tell first about Peep-Bo, because she is my oldest doll. I got her when I was one. There was a cake, and a candle burning on the top of the cake, and Peep-Bo was standing near. Frank often tells me about it, because he can remember.

Peep-Bo was made of china, and she had red cheeks and a green dress and lovely yellow hair and blue eyes. I used to lick her yellow hair, and it came off, and then Nursie washed her, and she turned quite white all over. Frank said I cried; but I only remember the day when I dropped Peep-Bo, and her head came off. Frank said she was "no good " then, but I loved her better than ever.

I kept her darling little head in one place, and her body in another, and it seemed as good as having two Peep-Bo’s.

One day Frank tried to mend my dolly, — Frank is the most clever boy, — and he did stick her head on with something grandpapa gave him, only he did it wrong,

— he stuck her head on to her little feet. She did look so funny, and Frank laughed and said she was "really no good" now, and I must throw her away, — but I never threw Peep-Bo away. I loved her more than ever.

She never got lost, poor Peep-Bo. She is in the toy cupboard now, with her little feet standing on the top of her head.

CHAPTER II


MY CARAVAN

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WELL, I must tell about my birthday. I was five on my birthday, and there was a big cake, and five candles burning, and I knew that I was old. I had lots and lots of presents. I had a caravan, and a Noah’s ark, and a round ball, and a box of chocolates, and heaps of other things; but I had no dolly. I wanted a dolly more than all my other toys, because my dolly Molly had only one leg and half an arm, and her nose was bitten off by Baby; and my dolly Peep-Bo was really no good at all except to stand in the cupboard.

Frank was looking at my toys, and he was playing with my fire-escape that Nursie gave me, and he began to reckon on his fingers all the toys I had got.

"I wish it was my birthday," Frankie said; "my birthday comes in the summer, and yours in the winter, Bo-Peep. I like the frosty and the snowy birthdays the best. I do wish mine was a snowy birthday."

"Because they are the nicest birthdays," I said; "and I was so glad mine was a winter birthday."

"You have lots of new toys," Frank said, and he gave a little sigh. "If you like, Bo-Peep, I will take your caravan out with me when I go for a walk with father,

— it is much too cold for a girl to go out, and it would be very wrong to let the poor horse that is tied on to the caravan go without his exercise. Shall I take him out for you, Bo-Peep?"

"I don’t think so," I said. "I think if I were to pull him up and down the nursery lots of times he’d do very well; and I want to put my doll Molly into the caravan and give her a beautiful ride."

Frank is a very fussy boy, and he sometimes gets red all over his face in a minute, and then I know he is going to go off into one of his fusses. Nursie calls them passions, but I call them fusses, ‘cause they make such a noise.

Frank said, with his face all red and his eyes staring:

"You are nothing but a baby, Bo-Peep. Of course the horse wants fresh air, and you think he will get it in this nursery, but you are only a baby girl. I don’t care whether your horse gets ill or not. I only wish I had a boy to play with."

Frank walked away, stamping his feet very loud on the ground, and I saw the tips of his ears behind all scarlet.

I couldn’t stand what he said. I was not a baby. I was a grown-up girl, — oh ! he was unkind.

I ran for my doll Molly and I popped her into the caravan, and then I took my horse by the bridle and I went across the nursery and out on to the landing, and I went with my caravan, and my doll Molly, and my horse, bump, bump, bump, down the stairs. I was looking for Frank.

CHAPTER III


MY DOLLY LULLABY

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On the first landing I met Cook. She was coming up the stairs slowly, because she is fat. She is a darling, Cook is, and she makes cakes and almond taffy, and all sorts of lovely things. She was coming up-stairs now with something big in her arms.

I said, "Hullo, Cookie ! What are you doing out of your kitchen ? Doesn’t. you know that this is my birthday and you have to see about the cake ?"

"The cake is all right, Bo-Peep," Cook said; "and I come up-stairs because of you, my dear, — I have brought you this."

"Oh! my dolly, my dolly," I said. "Oh ! I did want a dolly," and I dropped my horse’s bridle and held out my arms very wide.

"She’s the best I could give you, dear," Cook said; "and I am so sorry I hadn’t her finished sooner. I hadn’t her head fixed on quite right, Miss Bo-Peep, nor her lips painted properly until just now, or you should have had her before."

"Oh ! she’s so big, and so soft, and so darling !" I said. "Cook, I do love you."

"She’s a very neat doll, I think," Cook said. "I made her out of one of the master’s old shirts and two old pocket-handkerchiefs. I am sorry that I blotted her cheek, but the ink would run when I was drawing her nose."

"She has a darling crookedy nose," I said; "and I like crookedy noses, because you have one, Cookie, dear."

Cook laughed. "Well, Bo-Peep," she said, "you will take your dolly back to the nursery, and I am glad you are pleased with her. Dear, dear, you have a grand caravan and no mistake; but why are you bringing it down-stairs, love?"

"I am looking for Frankie," I said. "Frankie got into a fuss just now and went down-stairs. He said a lot of silly nonsense about me being a baby, but I aren’t, are I, Cook?"

"Dear the, no," said Cook; "I call five quite a weight of years. Don’t you mind Master Frank’s nonsense, Miss Bo-Peep. Just go back to your nursery, and play with your new dolly."

"I will, thank you, Cook," I said, "and I am so obliged that you think I am old."

Then I bumped my caravan up the stairs again, and I held my dolly that was made out of father’s old shirts and Cook’s pocket-handkerchiefs in my other hand, and I run in to Nursie.

"Nursie," I said, "see what I have got !"

"Well," Nursie said, " I call that a real comfortable doll, — a doll that won’t get broke, and that you can carry about and not care whether it falls or not. Now I do like this doll."

So do I," I said; "I think she is the darlingest dolly I ever saw. What name shall I call her, Nursie?"

"I think," said Nursie, "I would name her Lullaby, for if ever there was a doll to fondle and kiss, it is that doll in your arms this minute, Miss Bo-Peep. Why, you can take her to bed with you at night and be a real mamma to her, my dear."

Then I sat down on the floor with my dolly in my arms, and I began to put her. to sleep, because Nursie was putting baby to sleep. Nursie’s eyes were, shut and she was rocking baby backwards and forwards and singing "Hush-a-bye, baby."

So I shut my eyes and I rocked myself up and down, and I sung "Hush-a-bye, baby," to my dolly Lullaby.

CHAPTER IV


OUT OF BED AT THE WRONG SIDE

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I CAN never remember how time goes. Nursie says time goes so fast; but I think, and Frankie thinks the same, that time only creeps.

My dear snowy winter birthday was gone, and it seems to me that it was months and months after my birthday that I spent such a naughty day. Ellen says it was only two weeks after my birthday, but I really do think that Ellen is wrong.

Well, — one day I got up naughty. I did feel cross, and I did not care for Lullaby, and I did not want the sun to shine, and I did not want baby to laugh. I would splash when I was in my bath, and I would scream when Ellen was tangling up my hair after washing it.

Ellen said, "Now try and be good, Miss Bo-Peep," but I was not going to try, and Nursie said, "It is my opinion that Miss Bo-Peep has got out of bed at the wrong side."

Now really Nursie was too silly to talk in that way, for one side of my bed was up against the wall, and how could I get out at that side? I would not take notice of Nurse or of Ellen, and I walked into the day nursery with my head well up in the air. I said to myself, "I am five, and I am no baby, and I have not been treated proper."

Frank was at his breakfast, — Frank’s cheeks were as round and red as apples,
and his eyes were dancing up and down, and his hair was all goldy because the sun was shining across it.

The minute I came in, Frank said, "Look here, Bo-Peep, you may eat up your breakfast as fast as ever you like, and then I am going to tell you a secret."

I felt quite good again, for I do love secrets, and I sat down by Frankie’s side and ate up my bread and milk as fast as possible. "I am ready now, Frankie," I said. "I have eaten up all my breakfast of bread and milk, — so what is the secret, please?"

Frank’s eyes did twinkle very fast. "I heard what Nursie said just now," he said; "she was quite right, and you did get out of bed the wrong side, Bo-Peep."

"Oh, Frankie," I began, "you are a silly."

"Hush," Frankie said, putting up his hand. "Nursie did not mean it literal, — it just shows what a baby you still are, Bo-Peep, or you would know what she did mean. Anyhow, it does not much matter, and you need not get so red in the face. You are a very naughty girl to-day, aren’t you?"

"Well, perhaps I are," I said.

"You feel something as pussy does when her coat is rubbed the wrong way."

I am like pussy," I said.

"Bo-Peep," Frank said, "I like you when you are naughty."

"Oh!" I said.

"I do like you when you are naughty," Frank said. "I will tell you why I like you when you are naughty, Bo-Peep; because I am naughty, too. I am rubbed the wrong way like the pussy cat, and I got out of bed at the wrong side; and I will tell you what it is, Bo-Peep, you and I will do something ‘mendous naughty together, — this is what we will do."



CHAPTER V


DOWN THE STAIRS TO THE GARDEN

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I NEVER did see Frankie look nicer. I crept up very close to him, and I said, "I love you, Frankie. I do love you."

Oh ! that’s all right," Frankie said, "you may love me if you like, Bo-Peep; but that is nothing to say to what we have got to do now."

"What have we got to do?" I said. Frank jumped off his chair and ran to the window.

"It is snowing, I do declare," he said. "That is jolly. The sun has gone to bed, just as I wished him to go. Come here, Bo-Peep." I came.

"I hope you are not deaf," Frank said, "because I will have to speak to you in a whisper; perhaps I had better run downstairs and fetch grandpa’s ear-trumpet, and speak to you through that."

"Oh ! but indeed I am not at all deaf," I said.

"Well, hold up your ear and put your hands around, and then I will speak right in, and you must listen very hard and ask no questions, but just do what I tell you."

"All right," I said, " I am ready now," and I put my two hands round my ear as Frank wanted me.

We were all by our two selves, and I do not know why Frank could not have spoke to me as usual, but he did not. He blew out his cheeks very big, and he run to me, and he shouted so loud:

"Let’s come down-stairs without nobody seeing us, and let’s go out into the garden and make snowballs, and let’s take your new caravan and your horse Rover with us, and let’s come quick; we must be naughty to do it, so let’s come quick while we feel naughty."

"Oh, yes ! we must be naughty," I said, jumping up and down; "we must be very, very naughty to do it, — and oh! Frankie, darling, may I put my dear dolly Lullaby into the caravan ?"

"If you like," Frankie said. "It’s a very ugly rag doll, and it will be wet through when we fill the caravan with snowballs, but you may bring it if you like. Now, look sharp, Bo-Peep. I will run down-stairs and wait for you at the garden door, and you come after me as fast as possible with the caravan and the horse Rover and the doll."

Frank was unkind to speak like that of my dolly, but my heart was bumping too quick for me to mind him then.

I ran into the night nursery and I took Lullaby out of my cot, and I put her into the caravan, — oh ! I was afraid Nurse and Ellen would see, but they never looked, and I got out on the landing, and I ran down the stairs, and the horse Rover, and the caravan with my doll Lullaby inside, came bumpety, bumpety, bump, after me.

CHAPTER VI


DOWN IN A DRIFT
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WHEN I got down the stairs, Frankie said, "Come on, Bo-Peep. No one sees, and we will go out by the big door." There was no one in the hail. I joyfully helped Frankie open the big doors.

"We will be naughtier," said he, "to go through the evergreens into the garden, because the snow will rub off on us and we will be wetter."

So Frankie went along in the new snow, and I went behind him and dragged my caravan. The trees were heavy with snow, and it wet us and dripped on us, and the stiff leaves caught in my hair and tore my pinafore. It was very wet snow, and we were soon very nice and wet. Frankie looked back at me and laughed.

"Oh, dear! oh, dear ! you’ll catch it, and no mistake."

"And so will you, Frankie," I said. "Why, you are even naughtier than me, for you asked me to do it."

"Well, never mind," Frankie said. "It’s snowing very fast, and we’ll soon be covered. Come along this pathway, Bo-Peep, where the snow is very deep. There’s icicles hanging on to my nose, and there’s a fringe of snow round my ears. I’m a kind of snow-man, and you’re a Snow-Queen, Bo-Peep."

"I do wish an icicle would come on my nose," I said. "Oh ! Frankie, is we deep enough now ?"

We were up to our knees in the soft snow, and I think one of my shoes was lost, and Frankie did look so funny with all his goldy hair turned white, and my poor caravan was getting very wet and I was afraid Lullaby would catch cold.

"I think we have gone deep enough," I said. For I was frightened about poor Lullaby, because I did not think she was very strong.

But Frankie said, "Come on! come on!

I am Snow-King and you are Snow-Queen, and I hope we will soon get into
a drift."

Frankie shouted, and waved his arms in the air, and he pulled the caravan after him, and he did not mind even when the poor horse Rover fell on his side. I could not keep up to Frankie, and my feet were so cold.

Just then what do you think happened? The caravan fell right over on its side, and poor Lullaby was flung out of the caravan. I saw my dolly lying flat out on the cold snow, and I stretched out my arms to her. I thought I was catching her, but instead of that I began to fall and fall, and I heard Frankie say, "Hullo! Bo-Peep, you are a real Snow-Queen, and you are going to be swallowed up in a drift."

I was frightened then, and I was so sorry I had been naughty, and I said, "Please, God, forgive Bo-Peep." But the snow was very soft, and it came into my mouth and shut up my eyes, and I remembered no more.




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